The Crappy Mate Podcast title with pic of Richard Barnes MD and Barbra Quade, Therapist sitting
Hibiscus from Barbra Quade's Tucson garden

About us

Our mission is to reach more people in our podcast with practical wisdom and helpful hints to create happier, healthier, more loving relationships.

The Crappymate Podcast came about out of years of experience in our work with Patients and Clients and their concerns regarding their relationships. 


We recognized. that many people share similar issues in their relationships or partnerships. These issues have common roots in trust, appreciation, consideration, and the health of the relationship.  


We know that a number of people seek professional help with therapy and/or psychiatric services, but many do not. 


The Crappymate Podcast is meant to be helpful to individuals and couples but is not a substitute for couples' therapy or psychiatric care.  

Richard V. Barnes M.D

Dr. Richard V. Barnes, M.D. is a Board-Certified General Psychiatrist

Richard V. Barnes, M.D. has over 25 years experience in the General Psychiatry. 


He has worked in a number of settings including in-patient units, outpatient units, partial hospitalizations, Detox centers, Rehab centers, and he has had a Private Practice for many years. 


Dr. Barnes survived poverty of a New York inner city childhood by playing sports. His interests then and now are sports, music, and Martial Arts.


To this day Dr. B is an exercise enthusiast. Biking and swimming are daily practices. He practices what he preaches when it comes to promoting exercise.


Dr. B is a jazz aficionado. He is a former jazz trumpet player and he is an ardent Nebraska Cornhuskers football fan dating back to 1972.

Barbra Quade MFT

Barbra Quade is a Marriage, Family and Child Therapist

Barbra Quade has been a Marriage and Family Therapist for over 25 years. 


She has worked with individuals, children, couples and families. Her specialties include trauma work, working with Personality Disorders, and, most close to her heart, is working with family systems.


Barbra was born and raised in Santa Fe, New Mexico. Her upbringing contributed to her love of being outside, appreciation of the visual and musical arts, and her belief that each individual is unique.


Barbra loves the outdoors and believes in the healing power of nature. As a backpacker and tent camper, she has camped in the highlands of western Tibet, central Nevada, south tip of Patagonia, the Negev Desert, Ethiopia, Central Australia, Argentina, Bolivia, and Chile, and Pakistan.


At home she is an avid gardener. Her Urban backyard provides much of the family food.




Cleo does pro bono work as a therapy dog!

Cleo has her own trauma history. She was found in a park along with her leash and food. 

Like many others, she lives with anxiety.

Cleo is a welcome addition in the psychiatry office.



The Crappy Mate Quiz

Are you a Crappy Mate, crappy husband, crappy wife, crappy partner?

The Crappy Mate Quiz was designed to help you assess your strengths and weaknesses as a mate, spouse, partner, husband or wife.

This quiz will explore different aspects of your relationship and hopefully help you to hone in on developing skills to help with your union.


The Crappy Mate Quiz is a Self-scoring assessment tool designed to help you become a better mate.

This Quiz was developed to help individuals and couples identify areas of strengths and weaknesses in the individual and the couple dynamic.


We encourage you to go through the Glossary below before taking the quiz. Or hit the button to go directly to the the Crappy Mate Quiz.

Crappy Mate Quiz Glossary - Terms to be familiar with


Consideration is kindness and thoughtful regard for others, or an act of thoughtfulness. Treating others as you would have them treat you (The Golden Rule).


Recognition and enjoyment of the good qualities of someone and the ability to demonstrate, show, or verbalize these qualities.


A position or perspective from which something is considered or evaluated


The intentional decision to let go of resentment and anger

Emotional Availability

An individual's emotional responsiveness and attunement to one's mate's needs and goals


An appreciation of one's own worth or virtue. Proper regard for and attention to one's own happiness and well-being

Shared Decision-making

Both partners are aware a decision needs to be made. Both have input on how to proceed and how to share the process


The practice of taking an active role in protecting one's own well-being and happiness, particularly during periods of stress


Honesty, honor, and integrity mean uprightness of character or action. Honesty implies a refusal to lie, steal, or deceive in any way

Financial Responsibility

Living within your means, regardless of the level of those means. Full transparency of financial actions

Take the Crappy Mate Quiz

Contact Us

Resource List

NAMI - National Alliance on Mental Illness 

Suicide Hotline: Suicide and Crisis Lifeline- Online Chat

  • Phone - Dial 988
  • SMS - 988
  • 24/7 
  • Languages: English and Spanish